Barriers, Hurdles, Brick Walls

Language fluency is an interesting thing to ponder. In English, I can hear meaning behind the choice of words that someone uses. I can hear sarcasm, in all its splendor. In Spanish, it is always a struggle to hear more than what is said. I doubt I will ever truly be fluent. I am always concentrating intensely on what people are saying but sometimes the meaning still slips by me. For instance, Cristina came home two nights ago flustered and out of breath. From what I could gather, and it was little, a homeless man outside our building threw his shoe at her and chased her down the street. I am still not quite sure if this is right, but needless to say, I decided to stay in that night.

Or, take last night for example. I come home from school and Jesus tells me there is stew in the fridge for me. Nice. Paqui's lentil stew. It is great and and I am starving. So I proceed to dish myself an embarrassingly huge serving. There was enough in the container for two people, I am thinking, three thin people. When I am done, there is maybe a half bowl left.

So I gorge and I enjoy it thoroughly. That lentil soup is the stuff of gods. As I am happily wiping up the last remaining drops from my bowl with a huge chunk of crusty, delicious, carb-filled french bread, the rest of the family comes home. Paqui opens the fridge and frowns, confused. Where is all the soup, she asks.

Well, shoot.

And now here I am, sitting in silence and shame, as five people split the pathetic portion I left. I sat there wishing I had a hole to die in.

Now, in English this never would have happened. I am sure there was something in Jesus' voice that should have communicated that the stew was for everyone. I am sure he said, " Meg, our family dinner, to be enjoyed by all of us together whilst holding hands, is waiting in the fridge. Please, do help yourself to a reasonably sized portion of it." What I got was: "Stew in fridge for you. Eat."

It is a small thing, I know, and no one ever said a word about it to me. But it is things like that that make me think I have a long way to go with this language. It looks like I should expect to be doing a lot of really inappropriate, uncomfortable things. But, at least I won't be hungry.